Tuesday, December 9, 2008

Today I stand still a minute in memory of Zi On

He is surrounded by all the angels in heaven



Dear Kerks,

Today I stand still a minute in memory of Zi On. Though he is no longer with us, rest assured he is with his Creator, who loved him most all. He is surrounded by all the angels in heaven, and singing "Alleluia" Praise be the name of Jesus, "Alleluia".


Love,
Tah Chieh/Tua Ee
5-12-2008

Zi On, Precious child of God

No tears are shed in heaven
and I know the reason why


Hi Cho and Kerk,

Just penned these words that came to mind and reflect and pray with you in your journey with Zi On...steve


It is a year since you went away
Without a word or smile
a hug or cuddle to lighten my day
Sorrow knows no end
without your presence near
And if only you weren't so far away
I'd hold you close like that first day!
You came into our lives when you were born
and now Zi On you've suddenly gone.

A year has passed and we are a year closer
to seeing each other in our eternal final home.
Knowing you are with God makes it much easier
Oh what comfort to know you're safe and sound.
Rejoicing with the children of heaven in song
with the righteous of Christ where you belong.
I think of you and it still makes me cry
I still long for you and God knows why
It's been a slow year coming this anniversary.

No tears are shed in heaven
and I know the reason why
All the tears are shed down here
and they're rather slow to dry
My arms are empty, my heart -
like a jigsaw has a piece missing
Only you Zi On can
prevent it from breaking.
The thought of you will live on with us
until that day we see you again
and rise into the presence of God
and there you will be patiently waiting
and gently wipe the tears from our eyes.

Then we will rejoice and say together
Hallelujah a million times that
death couldn't keep us asunder
And now we'll always be together -
in the everlasting presence of God
who all his children will soon gather
in Heaven to rejoice
though now I long to hear your voice
and touch you once more
though now I am content with the memory
of your love and the life we had together.
Zi On, Precious child of God -
whom we raised for God
to whom we willingly, humbly surrender.

Steve Oh
on the Anniversary of Zi On
5-12-2008

Friday, December 5, 2008

Kerk Zi On - 1st Anniversary - 5 December 2008

In loving memory of my great son, Kerk Zi On -
On the 1st anniversary of your glorious departure on 5 Dec 2007

My dearest Zi On,

A year has passed since you left us without a good-bye to your dear papa, mama and brother Zi Lu, without a call, and not a word. But you left us with an forgettable smiling face - that last picture you took with your friends at the beach by the rock, you looked happy and full of life, life of youth at its peak, with a smile that radiates from a heart that is ever full of gentleness and love. You left us without a trace of where you have gone to, without a hint where you could have finally ended. Where are you, son? Silence…more silence. Only God knows.

You ended your earthly journey from that beautiful island Moreton where you bravely rode upon the mighty waves, and eventually and blissfully rested in the deep blue ocean or by the rocky shore, never to look back at what you left behind. But you did leave behind a life – that of another person, which you bravely saved and in the process sacrificially lost your own.


Sudden shock pounded on us. More shock, hard and merciless, swept over us like the mighty waves, followed by utter disbelief. You had gone? Just like that? Our hearts sank into a deep and dark hollow. Then came bewilderment and anguish. “He saved a life. O God, were Your hands too short to save his? Where were You in that hour when we needed You most for our dear son and brother?” We helplessly asked. News broke out – they called you a hero of the Bay! For us it was just the beginning of endless tears, unceasing pain, and deep sorrow and grief inconsolable.

Not a day has since passed without Ma missing you, Zi On. Losing you is a loss that cannot be measured, and nothing can compensate, for nothing is good enough. How could you just go like that, son, my dear son? Ma just could not let you go. I often look into the sky, when I see some beautiful array of clouds in the wee morning, or a bright afternoon or when the sun is going down. I hope to get a glimpse of you in the clouds, imagining heaven is there, where you dwell safely in the arms of Jesus.

Our life over this year is like the live painting of the garden scene outside our house - Dark clouds approaching, hovering above, we hear the winds coming from far, coming near, sending frightened little birds hurriedly seeking shelter, then reaching a crescendo, they powerfully sweep the palms, causing them to sway and bend helplessly in the direction of the force of nature. Then the chief arrived - thundering storms accompanied by flickering lightning, turning into fearless flashes across the dark sky. And the rain continues, like millions of tear drops crying over the land without you, whispering a song of silent grief which grips and penetrates the heart. Ever since you left, the scene of the tropical thundering storm in the late afternoon plays too frequently in front of our house. Yes, the house you left, never to return, leaving your mom often motionless, watching the rain outside the window, and my heart weeps once again. Son, are you Ok in the far away sea? You must be cold?! Yet your loving mom could do nothing.

Rain and sorrow are synonymous to me since you left.

Amidst the pain and endless longing, I searched for the meaning of your sudden departure.

You are the son we prayed for, and God gave by grace, not just a son but an angel of a son. When your name was chosen, we asked that this son would develop godly attributes in his character, and that God would shine through his life:

“Out of Zion, perfect in beauty, God shines forth”. Psalm 50:2

Looking back, I thank God that He molded and shaped you into a person whom He fulfilled that promise given 25 years ago. You have the most gentleness of spirit and a heart full of love. Your humility and meekness made me wonder with what strength you endured the arrogance and selfishness often seen in the world around you. Your ready smile characterized by a gentle spirit of kindness is what you gave to the world and to us. Son, my heart is full of your smiling face with the sweetest remembrance of you.

Son, Ma is now here in Brisbane, the last stop of your earthy journey where your heart was still searching for a brighter future in the horizon, where there were still many dreams you had desired to pursue and aspirations you had longed to fulfill.

Yet you had long decided that your aspiration was to be a man of substance, of courage, of true friendship. God granted your wish. That day, in the far away land, the beautiful Moreton Island, by the Bay surrounded by surging sea, you actually completed your mission on earth. Bravely taking your cross, you followed your Saviour’s footsteps. You gave your life for another person, thus fulfilling the word of the Lord,

“Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”
John 15:13

And the Lord called you His friend.

“You are my friends if you do what I command.” John 15:14.

And I know there awaited for you in heaven, a crown of glory, which the Lord has bestowed on you as He said “Well done, good and faithful servant…Enter into the joy your Lord.."

I am proud to be your mom, my great son! My dear Zi On, rest peacefully in the bosom of Jesus. And I look forward to the glorious hope that we will meet you again.

On, I love you!

Your loving mom,
5-Dec 2008

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

You took it a step further and made a true calling to be a saint indeed!


Dear Zi On,

A friend in need is a friend indeed... You took it a step further and made a true calling to be a saint indeed!

Your courage will echo forever in the hearts of your friends, who all know that you are truly a hero, and that your selflessness is indeed a blessing for all of us, your friends. I am fortunate to be touched by your benevolence...

It is indeed a sad passing but certainly one which has impacted the true value of life. Your have given me a new meaning of life and simultaneously, the true meaning of selflessness. I am humbled by your action and I am certain that you will be in heaven, reading these, knowing that your action has rippled through the hearts of many... I believe many will not be able to contain their sorrows for this very unfortunate passing; but you have just ended one journey, and to begin a new one in the Arms of God.

As for Zi On’s close ones, your grief should be enveloped with pride. Zi On has shown true courage and spirit to do what many will never ever do.

Zi On, you will be missed...!


With heartfelt condolences for the real hero,

Kenny Tan...
April 2008

(for Zi On from a mate in ANU)

It takes an extraordinary person to do what you did

I wonder how many people one would expect to meet in a lifetime
Even in a single day we encounter hundreds, possibly thousands, of individuals
They pass by us on the streets, they serve us at the checkout
They make our morning coffee, they work with us
They are friends of friends, they join our clubs

And every single person we meet and know will have some impact on our world
Some merely accompany us on this journey called life
They walk with us but do not change our paths
Others accentuate brief moments in time
They make these moments either brighter or darker
Others still spend entire chapters of life being a part of our lives
They influence our choices and see us through dark passages in time
And then there are those whose lives will intertwine with ours intimately
They can change the direction of our journeys entirely
They instill themselves in our hearts, and shape the musing of our minds

I never knew you well Zi On; that is my loss and regret
I read your testimonials and I realise what a fine man God was shaping you to be
You were, my parents' friends' son and our paths crossed only briefly during childhood
Yet, your passing and heroism has left a mark in my life
It has caused me to realise, once again, how fragile life is
How time is a gift from God that we can't claim for ourselves or take for granted
That the time to live life and show love is now, because tomorrow may never come
It has caused me to question how any one of us would have reacted in your shoes
Needless to say, it takes an extraordinary person to do what you did
And for that, I take my hat off to you and thank you

At first I could not understand, why God would allow this to happen
Why someone like you, the kind of man the world needs more of, had to leave
Why someone like you, who had so much to look forward to, had to go so early

But I have realised that God is God, and man is only man
Someone like you, has commanded a tremendous legacy through action and deed
Someone like you, is a testament to the greatest kind of love we could ever know

God's ways are higher than our ways, His thoughts higher than our thoughts

You were, and still are, so many things to so many people Zi On
To some, you were a companion on this sometime rocky earthly journey we walk
To others, you brought an extra smile or sparkle into short snippets in their lives
To others still, you were a confidant and friend, the one who made difficult days bearable
And then to some, you were the guy who coloured their world with rainbows
The one who left an empty hole where your presence, laugh, smile, love, used to be

But Jesus left an empty grave
Some grieved, but others who had revelation knew it meant something better
Not the end, but the beginning of something more incredible

In memory of you, Kerk Zi On.


Love in Christ
Ling Earn Teh, Melbourne Australia.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Almost anything reminds me of you!

My Dearest Zi On

It is 5 August today, my son, you have left us for 8 months. Still trying to settle down in your new home? How are you my son?

I miss you and I am still missing you. Tears fill my eyes easily as I look around the empty living room, and remember the time you sat at the sofa reading about speed-reading. I remember the time you were here teaching me some physical exercise which you believed was good for our health. I remember you took a picture of the main entrance door, hoping to record the familiar sound when the door is being opened or shut, you said you wanted to capture that sound, that part of your childhood or teenage years. Everything is still the same here in this quiet afternoon. But everything is not same anymore without you!

I just made two cups of coffee-one for me and one for you. A while ago, I was chatting with Hui, your NZ friend and who has become my NZ friend and daughter too. I told her that as I looked out from the big window, outside is a beautiful display of colours with blooming bougainvillea and many shades of green coming from various plants in our not- too-well maintained garden. Then I suggested as we chatted over the Internet, “Why don’t we have coffee, it is very warm here but cold in NZ.” So we did. As I sipped the coffee, I felt your presence in my heart, and Hui and I celebrated your life, the life of a Hero following the footsteps of Jesus, the life of an Angel who lives forever in our hearts.

Son, in 3 more days the world will be watching the Olympic Games. The Beijing Olympics is eagerly expected by everyone. I am sure you were looking forward to watch this world event, where the best of the world are competing with true spirit of sportsmanship and for the glory of Sports. I told Ying over the phone this morning that you don’t even have a chance to watch the 2008 Beijing Olympics. She said, “No he will watch the Games from where he is.” And your Aunt Cho Bee said, “Zi On is getting front row VIP seats watching the Olympics from above!!” I believe so, you will watch it with great enthusiasm. In my mind I can see you smiling away and then eagerly cheering your favourite sportsman or country.

Oh yes, today I read about Tottenham’s 3-0 win over Germany’s Borussia Dortmund in Rotterdam on Sunday to help the Londoners bag the Feyenoord Jubileum Tournament. Zi On, so once again, your favourite team has made you proud. Cheers!

Almost anything reminds me of you!

Son, my On, how am I going to continue my life without you? Recently at a church service in Kulim, I heard a very touching testimony from Pastor Albert Simon. His life was almost like Job, filled with real trials whether hardship, poverty, near-death sickness and ill-treatment due to his work for Jesus. Yet God sent “angels” to lift him up at each trial and then at each turn of event, God used him to minister to many people. I was very encouraged by his story. That evening, in Kulim, I was reminded to trust God by learning to be still before Him.

Zi On, Psalm 46:10 says: “Be Still and know that I am God”. When the going is tough, remember to cling to Jesus and be still before Him. I know I need to quiet my spirit and still my soul before our loving Shepherd and know that He is God. Son, that is what I will do, and that is what we will do.

Is everything not the same anymore without you? I ask myself. Our loving God remains the same, He changes not!


Love you forever, miss you every day, our dear Zi On.
Mama with Pa and Zi Lu
05-08-2008
If there is a way to measure a mother's love


Dear Zi On

Can' t let you go from my thoughts. I owe you billions. If there is a way to measure a mother's love, I owe you billions and billions.

I see a lot of birds around our house, I think of you, you said you wanted to see the birds around Unitata the last time you were back. I look out from the window, I hope you would walk past. I read casually sport news, I think of how much you loved football and had always dreamed of seeing a live UK or world match. I remember you copied many recipes from my cooking recipe books, you had wanted to cook yourself nicer meals when you returned to Australia and had to be on your own. I remember you read seriously "How to improve your reading speed” and eagerly shared the first chapter with me and taught me how to apply it. You always wanted to improve yourself. That afternoon we sat on the two sofas next to each other in our living room, reading about speed-reading. Now I look across and see only the empty sofas, still with the same cushions. I want to write emails to you, if only you can receive and read the tears now in the lines of my words. I call you, “On… On” and I "hear" your usual response, “Ma, Ma, how are you?" That unique voice that belongs to you alone and I privileged alone to hear the gentle calling. I often look at the sky, the morning scene-the promise of a new day, or the evening clouds wrapped in golden rays, I look and look, the sky is never the same, but my wish doesn't change, can I get a glimpse of my dear son up there?...Many ways, I can think of you, many moments, countless, I just long for you.

I know God knows, and I wish you know, your mother just can't stop missing you!

With love
Mama
21 July 2008

Monday, August 4, 2008

Zi On's Story

Reflection
2008-07-14

Zi On’s Story
by Steve Oh

I was in Teluk Intan recently. While navigating my car through the labyrinth
of jay-walkers I spied a curious-looking structure. Then I remembered about the Malaysian answer to the Leaning Tower of Pisa. I was told it used to be a water tank built by a rich Chinese businessman. It reminded me of the slanted morals of some politicians and how their crooked leanings will eventually make them topple over.

Believe it or not, when I was lost and asked for help, the strangers I had approached stopped someone who turned out to be a teacher at the place where I was supposed to go. Over the years I have grown to know what providence means. My God, Jehovah Jireh, is precisely that: he provides, even in the small things.

“When God is in control, nothing is out of control” is a lesson I learned some time ago. “Fret not at evildoers,” the Psalmist advises. The one who trusts in God will not be in a hurry, will not be flustered, will not be anxious. “Have no anxiety about anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God and the peace of God which passes all understanding will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus,” makes sense when we experience it through habit.

My purpose in visiting Teluk Intan was to be at a memorial service. Zi On had apparently drowned after saving a Korean woman off a beach in Queensland. He was the son of Kerk Choon Keng ( a senior executive of Unitata) and Cho Tan, and the brother of Zi Lu. I learned he was a bright, talented, handsome and godly young man, who was pursuing a Masters Degree and had everything to look forward to, from an exchange of emails with his parents, Navigators alumni whom I’d met in New Zealand as students.

I had felt burdened to write a couple of songs for Zi On whom I had never met. But in the spirit I felt a strong sense of closeness to him because of his commitment to God and struggle to grow in his relationship with his Heavenly Father. Like many young people in their twenties Zi On searched for his purpose in life. Yet he longed not for the success many young and even older people seek but something more substantial. Later, a prayer from his diary which his mother, Cho Tan, sent me enabled me to peer inside Zi On’ s deepest thoughts.

This was Zi On’s Prayer:

Make me a man of substance
Make me a man of courage,
Make me a man of dependability
Make me a man of persistence,
Make me a man of drive
Make me a man of compassion and empathy,
Make me a man of true friendship.

As I pondered the words I caught a glimpse of the soul of the man who could on reflex sacrifice himself so that another could live. Who among us would not be thinking of our own safety when facing such danger? Yet Zi On did something that was second nature to him, assuredly the fruit of his walk with God. His life has always been one of caring concern for others. A Boys Brigade leader, he proved that character was everything as his prayer reveals.

In the noble sacrifice Zi On paid the ultimate price to save another. While Zi On saved one life in a physical way, Jesus saves the world in a spiritual sense. God answered and Zi On personified his own prayer. The world is such a richer place because there are people who think of others before self. Many people die for vain and futile causes but to die to save a life is the supreme act of love.

In Sylvester Stallone’s latest Rambo movie, he made a poignant statement, “It is better to die for something than to live for nothing.” As Jesus himself said, “Greater love has no man than this, that he lay down his life for his friends,” and to die for a stranger is even more amazing.

While many pursue their careers, Zi On reflected on what really matters in life. He was not satisfied with the superficial, he wanted something of substance. “So young and so spiritually mature,” said a friend after Zi On’s memorial service. His maturity must humble us and challenge us not to live by the standards of the world but the holiness of Christ, who taught us not to love the world but to love God and our fellow men.

He came to serve, not to be served, and we lead by serving.

Zi On’s story is a challenge to me. Today he is still listed as a missing person. But I know that he is no longer missing because God has planned something better. “Why do you look for the living among the dead?” Jesus once asked those looking for his missing body they had buried in a tomb. Zi On like Enoch walked with God and has simply walked into his mansion in Heaven. “Though he dies, he will live,” Jesus promised.

At Zi On’s memorial service on Sunday 22 June, almost six hundred thronged the Methodist Centre Church in Teluk Intan to celebrate his life. A musician friend I had brought along to accompany me read the letters and testimonies that his parents had painstakingly pasted on the walls in one of the rooms in the church. He was touched and insisted in paying for some orchids I had bought for Zi On.

As the country is bewildered by the political twists and the political arena becomes bloodied and truth is churned in the cauldron of conspiracy and lies, how then shall we respond? How should Christians in politics behave? No different I guess from one in any other profession.

The truth is those who want to live for righteousness will face persecution whatever they do wherever they are. The honest judge who has to make a just decision against political pressure, the accountant who refuses to sign a cheque to pay off a corrupt supplier, the salesman who refuses to tell lies and so on. Everyone who wants to live an upright life in a crooked society will face perils of one sort or another.

“In this world you will have tribulation, “Jesus said, and he comforts, “but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world.” We can overcome evil with good because love never fails. In the face of the prevalent evil around us, we are not to repay wrong with wrong but do all in our power to do what is just and good.

It does not make us bimbos, or turn us into passive mats to be trampled on but it makes us act consistently as children of light - truthful, firm and forthright. We should be grateful we do not live in a country where the power of the gun rules. There is hope for reason to prevail. And those who see only the giants in the land of Canaan will never enter the Promise Land and watch God perform exploits.

The challenge is for the younger generation not to be inordinately concerned with careers to the detriment of their spiritual and social responsibilities. But it is also a responsibility for all including older men and women. A few weeks ago a sixty-year old friend divulged he had joined a political party. He related that when he told his wife, she retorted, “What took you so long?” Sitting on the fence is for crows. God’s people are always on the righteous side of the fence. They are not beholden to any who commit and promote wrongdoing but those who do right because righteousness exalts a nation.

Zi On’s story is a challenge to us all especially the young to look for something of substance to build into their lives and to do for others. I hope God’s people will not dress up for battle and then go to bed. This is the problem of heart-warming sermons that send the soldiers home Sunday after Sunday without a plan of action. Sermons are only as good as the practical applications that result. Vain is the preacher who sees the sermon as the end not the means. Changed lives and transformed societies is what church is about.
Help those in need, act and avoid excuses. We are to be those who put our hands to the plough, who are not afraid of anyone or anything because “if God is for us who can be against us?” Many want God on their side but are they on his side? God sides with the humble and just and supports those who help the needy but will punish those who do evil.

From the heart of a father

Celebration of Life – Kerk Zi On
Tribute Service held on 22 June 2008, at Teluk Intan Wesley Methodist Church, Malaysia

From the heart of a father –
Sharing by Kerk Choon Keng, Zi On’s dad, at the Service


1. Welcome and thank you.
President of Trac Rev. Ong Hwai Teik, all our dear friends and relatives,

Cho Tan, Zi Lu and I are deeply touched by all of you leaving everything just to be with us today. Many of you have to travel long distances from North, South and East of the Malay Peninsula and from Singapore. Some of you have to take special leave and cancel other appointments to travel from Australia, Canada and Mongolia in order to be with us today.

One author beautifully describes what friendship is. He said, “friends are just like stars. You will not see them during your bright day light. However, they will appear when your day turns into dark night.” My dear friends thank you for being the Stars of my life and my family’s lives. Your presence brighten our darken soul.


2. Our feelings
It was a traumatic time for me and my family when the Brisbane Marine Police broke the news about our son Zi On on 5-12- 2007. It was just like the blood stained robe of Joseph brought home to his father Jacob. Ah, like Jacob, it would be better for me the father to go ahead to “sheol” instead of my son.
All of you are saddened and in grief with us over what had happened to our son Zi On. The following words forwarded to us by two of our dear friends would precisely describe the inner feeling for most of us here.

Koay Chee Hoe from Bangladesh wrote:
“I’m sorry it has taken me this long to write to you… not that I have forgotten you… the simple reason is, I didn’t know what to write, where to begin, how to make sense of all this……
“I wept the first time I read your letter, and I still weep every time I read it or the blogs dedicated to Zi On. If for me the tears cannot stop flowing, I can’t imagine how much you’ve already shed.”

Adrian Ding wrote:
“ I sat in silence and share your deep sorrow and pray the Father will cover you with His grace for a time such as this.”

3. Our comfort
In our grief, we found comfort when we discovered Zi On’s devotional diary-through which we are assured of his faith and devotion to God. This also helps us to have a deeper understanding of his inner man.

This Tribute Service is carried out with three purposes:
a. To bring to all our dear friends and relatives first hand information about Zi On’s life, his beliefs and his journey to glory.
b. We have received more than 150 tributes written on Zi On’s life from our friends and Zi On’s friends and relatives. These words of encouragement we want to share with you and hopefully they will bring you comfort as they have brought to us. We know it is difficult for you to go through all of them today; we have recorded the two power-point presentations and most of the tributes into a CD for you to take home. Pastors and various Ministry leaders, if the content of the CD can be an encouragement to the people you are ministering to, you are welcome to use them.
c. That the name of God be glorified through the act of His servant Zi On.
We are just like Mary and Joseph, after Jesus was crucified, nothing else could be done except to return to Galilee. The rest, we leave it to the hand of the almighty God. Only He alone can glorify His holy name.

Lastly, I want to share with you fifty four sentences I have written for Zi On. It took me a long time to complete them as each thought brought grief and pain and I had to stop until I could pick up again. (See below)

Today Is Your Birthday Mama Will Not Cry

My dear Son, Zi On,

Mama says today is your birthday, she will not cry,
I am not sure I can even if I try.
I keep myself busy whole morning with earthly chore,
living as if everything is normal as before.
Numbing the senses just to ease the wound deep in the core,
Fond memory of you takes no second for the pain to soar.

Mama says today I have to write something for you.
Twenty six years ago our baby Zi On arrived with the midnight dew,
Simmering joyful excitement and knitting hope in our soul.
What name shall we give our son?
“Out of Zion, perfect in beauty, God shines forth.”
Psalms 50:2 is our dream your life will one day surge for.

Oh, Moreton, Moreton, a perfect spot wrinkles into soul chilling grill,
Sweet surfing sea suddenly ruptures into life searching field.
“Joseph’s blood-stained robe brought home to Jacob” * 1
Was the Brisbane Police’s breaking news for the soul to choke.
Fanning worldwide prayer support to seek God’s alternate plan,
Ah, like Jacob, it would be better for dad to Sheol if it can.

No one can serve two Masters, you have chosen the best,
Seeking the Lord’s molding hands shaping your life to fit His chest.
“Make me a man of courage and substance,
Make me a man of drive and persistence,
Make me a man of compassion and empathy,
Make me a man of true friendship and dependability
. a*

“Greater love has no one than this that a man lay down his life for his friends”,
“You are my friends if you do what I command”, for the heart of God is love and not frail.
The surging sea and crushing waves witness two strangers in distress,
I will do what I can to relieve the pain of the mothers of the drowning guests.
“Why am I fearful, O me of little faith? Jesus as I’m with You, be with me now.”a*
“For unto Thee I surrender my life”, show me the beauty of your wonderful how!

The bravery in the blood swells,
When the drowning girls yell.
Sure and Steadfast the motto built to last,
The courage of Brigade Sergeant did not lose its cast.
Dashing forward against the mounting waves,
Pushing the distressed to safety before succumbing to the potent sway.

Were You there, when the sea turned ugly?
Were You there, when our son in dire need?
Can a mother forget the baby at her breast ? *2
Ah, wantonly we had deserted you when you cried for aids!
Pain and grief overwhelmed our sky dark,
Valley of sorrow our heavenly Father trailing with us.

O my God, why is Psalm 22:1-6 instead of Psalm 23:1-6 my soul dwell,
The Lord sits enthroned over the flood that swell, *3
For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither my ways your ways
As heavens are higher, so are my ways and thoughts higher.*4
How preciously guarded is the name of the Lord’s Holy hill,
“Out of Zion, perfect in beauty, God shines forth” shall remain still.

O dear Zi On, proud you hang on to faith in God,
Absolutely make us feel little when you walk our talk.
Beauty of your spirit shall continue to radiate the eternal light,
Brighten up the path for all who tread on the dark side.
Assured you will sit with the martyrs when we see you on The Day,
Today is your birthday, she will not cry, Mama says.


With love and endless memories
Papa
14-Jan-2008


Note:
*1 - Genesis 37: 5-35
*2 - Isaiah 49:15
*3 - Psalm 29:10
*4 - Isaiah 55:8-9
a* - Extracts from Zi On’s diary

Sunday, June 29, 2008

Celebration of Life - Kerk Zi On

Our Dearest Zi On

Today, 22nd June 2008, Papa, Mama and Zi Lu together with nearly 600 friends and relatives gathered at T.I. Wesley Methodist Church to celebrate your life - a great life, full of meaning and purpose! Our dear son and brother, we honour you today in the presence of God, and together with our friends and your friends, and relatives, we give God the glory for your life.

We love you, son!
I love you, Kor!

Pa, Ma and Zi Lu.



“From Zion, perfect in beauty,
God shines forth” Psalm50:2


Celebration of Life

Kerk Zi On


Promoted to Glory in the Presence of the Lord
on 5.12.2007.

Because Jesus lives, Zi On lives also!

Tribute Service
22nd June 2008
Wesley Methodist Church, Teluk Intan

TO GOD BE THE GLORY !

Friday, May 9, 2008

They called him a hero, I called him My friend

On that day,
when he entered the sea to save the girl in peril,
He entered with a sense of true friendship.

Seeing only someone in need, even a stranger in danger,
His heart was stirred with compassion and empathy.
Against the roaring seas and the tumultuous waves,
he dashed in with a spirit of drive and courage,
Thinking only of the safety of others and not his own.
With persistence and determination he set out to do his task.
Ensured that the person in danger was brought safely to the rocks,
he finished what he set out to do, completely dependable !
From where did he marshal the strength,
for he himself was only of thin frame ?
Who would believe it? Who would expect it?
He saved someone’s life but in the process, lost his own.
And they called him a hero.
That courage, that bravery and that love
can only come from You, our Creator in heaven-
Your endowments that made him truly a man of substance.
And in that moment of gallantry that none could ever imagine;
and by that noble act of love that few would dare to attempt,
He glorified Your Name!
Truly, on that day, God fulfilled his aspiration :
I believe that I was born for something big in this world.”
For he obeyed the call of Jesus :
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.”
And he became a friend of Jesus, as the Lord said:
You are my friend if you do what I command.”


Cho Tan
5-5-2008


(Remembering you today, remembering you every day.
We truly miss you, our dearest son, Zi On.
With much love from Ma together with Pa and Zi Lu)

Monday, April 7, 2008

Your smiling face

Our dearest Zi On,

Another month has just gone by. During these 30 days or so, my mind was filled with your memories -

Your smiling face, so full of life, your gentle demeanor, your hearty laugh, your readiness to help - be it a simple household chore or driving me home after my hospital visit, that courteous greeting to each person you meet, be it your friends or ours, your unassuming attitude, as how Aunt Jen described, “he never exerts any self-importance”, your willingness to listen to someone’s boring complaints about life or old stories from a lonely heart, and many more endearing memories.

That is you, son, how can I ever forget that beautiful person who enriched the lives of so many of us!

We viewed again the CD Han gave us. It is a precious glimpse of your short and happy time with the Judah8 life group of Hope Church, UQ. We are so grateful that they kept records of the activities of the group. We read again the testimonies your friends wrote about you; what kind of person you are to them and how in that short time, you had left a lasting impact in their lives.

But as Chris Yong wrote:

“Zi breezed into our lives, and just as quickly, as is likely the case, left in a jiffy.”

Son, though you are gone, you will never be forgotten; you will always live in our hearts!

Papa has just completed a PowerPoint presentation about you - story of the 1st Teluk Intan BB Company Sergeant, for the Malaysian BB National Conference to be held in Kuching next week.

He worked tirelessly for a few nights. As we reviewed it together, we said to ourselves, if only you were here with us to see this yourself. You would be so encouraged to hear the many affirmative words your friends said about you; words that touched our hearts, but this is because you had first touched their lives! As we continued the viewing, I suddenly realized that Papa’s eyes were filled with tears, he was silently sobbing. Son, I know Pa loves you! Zi On, you left us so suddenly and mysteriously, leaving us with anguish questions that only God has the answers!

For us, our life has reached a stage where the only choice we have is to continue to trust God and believe in His sovereignty. This needs courage, plenty of it; this needs faith, unwavering faith; this needs God, we are thankful that He exists!


Love you always,
Mom together with dad and Zi Lu
6-April-2008

Sunday, March 23, 2008

HAPPY EASTER !

The dawn has come.

The Lord has risen! Christ the Lord is risen today!

We remember our Lord Jesus Christ as the risen Saviour today.
By His resurrection, He has conquered death.

Jesus said:
“I am the resurrection and the life; he who believes in me, though he die, yet shall he live, and whoever lives and believes in me shall never die.” John 11:25-26

He lives forever for you and us and all mankind.
He lives that we may live with Him forever!

HAPPY EASTER! dear Zi On.


Love you always,
Pa, Ma and Zi Lu

23 March 2008

Wednesday, March 5, 2008

Remember you, Remember our nation

My Dearest Son Zi On,

Today is 5th March 2008. I suppose you never realized that you would miss 2008, another year of challenges both in your personal life and in the world around you.

Yes, you were looking forward to the country’s coming election. I remember you told me that you wanted to cast your rightful vote as a citizen for the first time! Somehow you seemed to know that the General Election would be held this year and you talked to me eagerly about it. Son, you were right, our country’s 12th General Election will be just 3 days from now. It is the day every citizen decides, and it is every citizen’s responsibility to cast his or her vote wisely, choosing a government formed by righteous, wise, caring, responsible and capable leaders. Son, you will be happy to know that this year there are many new and young faces, aspiring to take the baton to lead and bring our country to greater heights, aiming for a prosperous, just and peaceful nation and to meet the challenges of the new era. I am sure you want to see our country thriving under the sun as a country that every citizen is proud to belong, living life, pursuing dreams and moving forward with gratitude for the past and courage to face the challenges that life itself brings. This may have to start with every individual whether we are leaders or those being led, whether we are old or young, whether we are endowed with natural or trained capabilities or just quite ordinary, to be a person of substance, of courage, of persistence, of dependability, of drive, of compassion and empathy, and of true friendship. These are the qualities you aspired to be as you wrote in your journal. If every individual aspires and pursues these traits in his or her character development, I believe our nation will be one that every citizen is truly proud to belong.

I read this Psalm two days ago (Ps 33v12):
“Blessed is the nation whose God is the LORD, the people he chose for his inheritance.”

So I prayed for Malaysia, our beloved country. It is good to pray for our nation not only now as the people are going to the polls to choose their leaders who will wisely lead our nation and who will serve the people with integrity. It is also important to pray that we will be a nation whose people know and honour God as God. Son, I also prayed for two other countries which are very dear to me: Australia and New Zealand, and you certainly know why they are so dear to me besides our own country.

Son, if you can see us from where you are, I covet your special prayers for Malaysia on the 8 of March, 2008. By the way I have checked and confirmed that your name is in the national voting Register and a serial No. had been assigned to you. I truly hope that there is ballot box in heaven for you to cast your vote; and if there is, I know son, you will do it truthfully, wisely, and with a smile, for this is the first time you are exercising your right, and you believe that every vote counts!

I remember you, my hero son! I remember you at this time of significance for our nation.

Miss you so much, son! Miss you so much, my dear Zi On!
Love forever,
Ma together with Pa and your dear brother Brian,
5 March 2008

Friday, February 15, 2008

Tribute by Pastor Christopher

I had the privilege of knowing Zi On Kerk during his stay in Melbourne for his foundation studies. I first met Zi On at the International Student Fellowship (ISF) of Swanston Street Church of Christ (now know as CrossCulture). As many of those who knew him would attest, Zi On was a very humble, genuine and compassionate person.

It was my joy to be able to meet Zi On regularly for Bible Studies. In our exploration of Scripture and sharing of lives, it became evident that Zi On was really hungry and serious for God. At that time, I knew that Zi On had come from a family well known for their commitment and service to God. But Zi On would not rest on the laurels of his family’s reputation. He wanted a strong personal relationship with God himself. So, we would spend hours taking about Jesus, the purpose of life, and our joys and struggles together.

There is a season for everything under the sun. And our spiritual journey with the Lord is a process. It became clear that the next few years after leaving Melbourne would prove a testing time for Zi On’s faith.

But praise be to God who renews and refreshes all things in His perfect timing. I was very encouraged to hear that Zi On’s persistence in the pursuit of God and holiness had paid off! With a renewed vigour, purpose and hope in the Lord, Zi On blossomed greatly in his relationship with God and with brothers and sisters-in-Christ during his postgraduate studies in Brisbane.

I have no doubt that the instinct Zi On had to jump into the sea to save the young woman came from the peace he experienced in his relationship with God. Zi On’s search was finally over. He had finally accomplished and achieved what he had wanted so much years ago in Melbourne. He now had a strong personal relationship with the Lord God! And our Lord, in His infinite wisdom, decided that day that it was time for Zi On to come home and experience the Lord’s Sabbath Rest.

Zi On is a hero. And not just because of his bravery. He is a hero because he did not let anything get in the way of his pursuit of God. God had already found Zi On many years ago, even before his time in Melbourne; but God had allowed Zi On to pursue Him wholeheartedly in his time in Australia. The goal of the Christian life is to know intimately our Lord Jesus Christ. Even though Zi On’s life may seem short to us, but he had achieved his goal.

I pray and wish that all his friends, including myself, throughout Australia and Malaysia, will learn from Zi On’s example. Zi On showed us the better way of love in Christ. May we have the courage to lay down our lives for Jesus and others if the Lord should so desire for us to do so.

We at ISF are proud to have known Zi On. Zi On epitomizes what it means to deny ourselves, take up the Cross and follow Jesus. Thank you Lord for making our lives more meaningful by allowing us to cross paths with your dear son. And thank you Lord for the encouragement that we will meet Zi On again on that special day when you return. We are sad but not in despair for we have hope that will not fail us. Give us your strength to live victoriously and joyously for you each day. In Jesus’ precious name we pray, Amen.

Christopher Ngo

Associate Pastor, International Student Ministry

CrossCulture Church of Christ, Melbourne, Australia

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

We Must Dare To Live - We remember you today, Zi On

Dearest Zi On,

Today is 5 Feb 2008; you have left us two months already! During these two months, there has not been a day that we have not thought about you, talked about you and missed you. We miss you so much dear son, we miss you!

This morning I remember you, I want to begin today by going to God and hear what He says. Let me share with you what the Lord says in Psalm 65: 1-8. I am reminded that:

God our Saviour is the hope of all the ends of the earth
and of the farthest seas.
Praise awaits Him!

Son, what I hear from Psalm 65 is so beautiful!

O God Our Saviour, Praise Awaits You!
(1)
O God our Saviour,
The hope of all the ends of the earth
and of the farthest seas.

Praise awaits you!

O You who hear prayer,
To You all men will come.
You answer us with awesome deeds of righteousness.

(2)
O God our Saviour,
The hope of all the ends of the earth
and of the farthest seas.

Praise awaits you!

Who formed the mountains by Your power,
Who stilled the roaring of the seas,
The roaring of their waves.

(3)
O God our Saviour,
The hope of all the ends of the earth
and of the farthest seas.

Praise awaits you!

Those living far away fear your wonders;
Where morning dawns and evening fades
You call forth songs of joy.

(4)
O God our Saviour,
The hope of all the ends of the earth
and of the farthest seas.

Praise awaits you!

Blessed are those you choose
And bring near to live in your courts,
Who are filled with the good things of your house.

~~~~~
O God Our Saviour,
Praise awaits You!

_________________

From Psalm 65:1-8
_________________

Yes, God is our hope and He awaits our praise. In times like these, can we still praise Him? Yes, in sorrow, we can still come to Him with our praises. We praise Him even with our tears, for He is our hope, the anchor of our souls.

But son, I also want to remember you with joy! You are such a beautiful person! Though you might not realize it, you had touched so many people. Many of our friends in UP and in Unitata, and in T.I. Wesley share our pain, they cry our cry, they grieve our grief, but they also share our hope and our joy. They are all proud of you. Aunty Siew Tin said that she is honoured to have known you.

Aunty Shela could not stop her tears when she talks about you.
After you were born, we took you back from the KL hospital to Unitata. It was Aunty Shela who helped us to carry our precious baby as we traveled home. And she continued to help us to take care of you for nearly 6 years. She is one of the very few people we know who is always gracious, gentle and kind, respectful and dedicated in carrying out her duties. I can’t remember if I had told you that I gathered a few friends in Unitata and celebrated her 50th birthday in Aug 2006 in our home. It was an honour to celebrate her special day in our home. Son, remember you told me not too long ago that that you wanted to buy a gift for Aunty Shela? Well son, Ma had fulfilled your wish on your behalf. I bought her a brooch. It is a beautiful Angel of Mercy with a message -
This “thoughtful” little angel has a little
wisdom to impart,
About those very rare souls that step quietly
into our heart,
Truly Angels of Mercy, special people sent
by God above,
With special reserves of strength and
Dedication tempered with love.

This message speaks of her, I am sure you agree. We are always thankful that God had sent such kind people to our lives, and son, I know that you are forever grateful to her, as we are. (Shela came just now, and I presented this gift to her on your behalf with your love.)

The world is beautiful because there are people who believe in LOVE. Son, you believe in love and your life is a story of love. Though you are still so young, you showed us what true love is. We are humbled by your example and we will continue to emulate you. Yes, we remember this is what Jesus said, “A new commandment I give to you that you love one another, by this all men will know that you are my disciples”.

Zi On, life is never the same without you! Papa, Zi Lu and I try to go on with our lives. But every corner of our house reminds us of you. The little teddy bear which you bought for me at the Fight Cancer campaign is your reminder that I should continue to battle against breast cancer with courage and determination. Though you are not here to cheer me in person any more, son, I must continue the race with victory as my goal.

Your loss brought a sudden and inconsolable pain to all of us. I find myself often thrown into a turmoil of two opposite swings of emotions. At times, there is a strong sense of courage to go on as I remember the legacy you left behind. Sometimes just as I thought I am managing my grief, uncontrollably, tears would fill my eyes, as memory of your sudden departure hit me hard with unimaginable helplessness.

Tough it may be, and tougher it may get, but to quote your dear Uncle Kuan (your Ah Koo): “We must get on with what is both the simplest and the most awesome of tasks: we must dare to live.”

Yes, Zi On, we must dare to live!


I love you, Son,
Ma together with Pa and Zi Lu
5-2-2008

Friday, January 18, 2008

That little action is what the world needs more - A Tribute to my cousin, Zi On

I was at OCF Convention Camp 2007 when I heard the news from my parents. The line was bad due to the fact that I was in the outback. But the words that rang through my ears were loud and clear.

"Zi On… your cousin, is lost at sea.... They haven't found him yet ….presuming the worst."
The words echoed through my head.

In camp, the BS group that I was in, prayed for him, and those from WA, during discussions and prayer sessions, linked hands and prayed for him and the family.

That night at camp, as I lay my head down on my pillow, I could not help but wonder - how could an Almighty God whom so many look to as their Saviour allow such a person to be taken in such a manner especially when he saved another person through his actions? I guess during such times, many would have asked the same question.

Humanly speaking, I've no idea why. No reason or logic would be able to explain it. Theologically, one can only say, God knows what is best and we have to trust Him. To tie a knot between the spiritual realm and the physical realm is almost impossible. Even now as I type this, I'm sure that many of my family members are still grieving and even we who are Christians and have that hope in Christ, still find ourselves struggling with this reality. Until the second coming of Christ, I guess we will forever be tied to this physical realm and never be able to experience the fullness of this understanding. I do not wish to debate on theology or humanity but just to share some of my thoughts about Zi On.

During my quiet time in the past few nights, I’ve been thinking very hard about this whole issue. And here are a few words I have penned out. This is not a poem….just my thoughts.

Many will see us differently
Many will describe us differently.

Yet in many ways, we are similar
The quietness with certain friends
Or even the sanguine jokes we tell others.

We share a common love you and I
For music and football
Although I’m an MU fan
And you a Tottenham Hotspur guy

I've seen you,
For who you are.
The few words exchanged
The simple actions you did
Adequately identified you.

The pool at Unitata was where it began
Where my dad played the “bad monster”
Splashing
and chasing us around.

We were scatteringI was the last one out
But I slipped and fell back in.
You looked back
You ran back and pulled me up
Saving me from the approaching “monster”.

But what you showed me that day
That simple action
Which few would even consider an option
You stood out from the rest.

You showed me
To make that difference…
just to turn back in a simple way
to give that hand and risk that “life”

That childhood pool day was enough to show
That you just stood out And I’m not surprised
That you did it again.
To risk your life to save another.

And as much as it was child’s play
I saw that you were different.
The power of one’s action
May it be big or small
Or light as a butterfly’s touch
Has a lasting effect.

And though I can no longer see you anymore
I’m sure those that you have left behind
Were very grateful that they have crossed paths with you.
That effect
That smile
That little action
Is what the world needs more.


It’s a privilege to have known you
To have tasted your goodness
To have shared some special moments with you
I’m proud to have you as my cousin.

So to Zi On, may your soul rest in peace.

With love from your cousin,
Lemuel
16 Jan. 2008


Unitata’s swimming pool in Teluk Intan - April 1988
(From left : Lemuel, Zi On & Zi Lu)

Thursday, January 17, 2008

To My dearest Nephew Zi On

Remember that your loss is shared
By many dear ones who care
You’re always in our thoughts and hearts
And in our every prayer.

May you find the courage to face tomorrow
In the love that surrounds today.
At this time,
May the love of family and friends
Be a comfort to you.

At this time of pain
May these truths sustain you……
Your loved ones will always be as close as a memory.
And the God of all love and comfort
Will always surround you.

It will be the little things that you will remember,
The quiet moments, the smiles, the laughter
Though it may seem hard right now
It will remain a memory of these little things
That help to push away the pain
And bring our smiles back again !


From: Tuah Ee Christina,
I always love you.

Monday, January 14, 2008

Happy Birthday Dearest Zi On,

Today would have been your 26th birthday.
The day you were born, you brought happiness and pride to all of us.
We are all so very happy and proud to have you in our lives.
Though your Earthly journey was short, you have touched many lives.

Remember the time we spent together in Melbourne?
Though short, I treasured every moment of it,
to have you and Ying with me for a year.
I was supposed to be your elder sister, to guide and protect you,
but instead, you guided and taught me.

In my worst moments, you were there.
You went looking for me but I was not ready to be found.
I needed that space and time to find my own path and strength.
And you understood, in that tender age of 18.
You taught me that it is okay to feel my emotions, no doubt incomprehensible at that time.
You did not pass any judgment.
You gave me time and space to find my own journey.
Your sentiments were so pure and sincere.
Your words of comfort and love were felt.

There is a saying, “To love for the sake of being loved is human, but to love for the sake of loving is angelic.”

And Zi On, you love for the sake of loving.

You taught us “Love is a better way”.
In your selfless act, you taught us what
love,
compassion,
strength,
courage and
bravery meant.

Zi On, you are a person who did not seek glory
and yet in your own ways
you have glorified many, touched many lives and
helped many become more fully who they were meant to be.

Though we missed you so very much,
You have also helped us understand that these painful moments in our lives are sacred.
I am privileged and honored that you are in my life.

Zi On, you are loved. You are missed.
You are indeed an Angelic Hero.

Thank you On, for your enlightenment.


Love always,

Euling Che Che
14 January 2008

Today is your birthday

Dearest Zi On,

Today is your birthday -- 14-01-2008.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ! SON, MY DEAR SON.
You are 26 today! We celebrate your life!

On, Happy Birthday! I love you, mama loves you, Pa loves you,
Zi Lu loves you.

The Lord Jesus loves you! Yes, God, our Heavenly Father, He who created you, He loves you.

I praise God because you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are a unique individual, specially created for a special purpose. You are highly valued by God.

After papa and I were married in 1979, I began to pray that God would give us a son. Yes papa and I prayed to God for you.

Yes, I remember I asked God like Hannah did that God would give me a son, I specifically asked for a son. And I also told the Lord that my son would be given to Him for His use – that his life would be useful to Him.

As I look back now, yes, the Lord has indeed heard my prayers.
God gave you to us, and God used you.

‘What name shall we give our son?’ we asked when you were born.
When we looked into the Bible for inspiration and guidance,
Psalm 50:2 stood out:

Out of Zion, perfect in beauty,
God shines forth.

We know Zion refers to God, His holy mountain, the mountain which symbolizes God, His righteousness and His total attributes of His holiness and perfection. It was our prayers and desires that this gift from God, this son of ours would develop the attributes of godliness and that God would shine forth in his life.

In order to retain the Chinese identity, we had broken the word Zion into 2 parts Zi On and to add another meaning to his name. ie.
Zi On is made up of 2 Chinese characters. Zi in Chinese means fulfilled, On is grace. So the second meaning of your name is by the grace of God, our wish (for a son) is fulfilled.

Son, for many years, I know that you had been searching for your purpose in life.

I had frequently shared with you of my purpose in life. I shared with you that from young I searched for a meaningful life. To me it is so important that I live a meaningful life. When I found Christ and finally committed my life to Him, I already found the answer to my quest – A meaningful life is to have Jesus.

“To know Christ and to make Him known” is my aspired life vision. I told you that there is no other vision better than this for me. For papa it is the same. Together, when we were married, we also entrusted our lives to God with this goal and claimed this great promise of God in Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be yours as well.” (all the things we need for this life God will provide)

Son, you know that this is for us. But you said you wanted to know God not through our faith. You wanted to experience God yourself and find your life purpose yourself.

Remember we shared this together?

Some wandered in desert wastelands,
finding no way to a city where they could settle.
They were hungry and thirsty,
and their lives ebbed away.
Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble,
and he delivered them from their distress.

He led them by a straight way
to a city where they could settle.
Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love
and his wonderful deeds for men,
for he satisfies the thirsty
and fills the hungry with good things.

Ps 107:4-9

And I thank the Lord for He has heard your cry and my cry.

You had finally come to Jesus and not through our faith, but your own. You surrendered all your burdens to Him as you recorded in your journal:
“I surrender to Jesus- my poverty replace with His rich treasures, all challenging situations with patience and encouragement through God’s love and patience, place my burdens on God’s shoulders, acknowledge His power in my life.”

To me, this is one of the greatest joys for any parents who know Jesus and want their children to know Him, too.

But this is only part of your story, though an important one.

Yours is also a story of love.
You teach us that love is a better way.


You teach us that love is a better way,
not success as men of the world want to see;
not achievements, though many strive with no end;
not riches if you have to toil all your life and miss it;
not praises from men, for God understands what is in a
man.

You teach us that love is a better way-
To love is to love now,
not till your task is over
nor later for an appointment that cannot be missed;
to love is to give now,
not when you have made more;
to love is share now when someone has a need,
not when you are free with no commitments to meet;
to love is to listen now,
no story or dream of another is too boring;
to love is to pass no judgment,
but a word of encouragement;
to love is to be kind and gentle to anyone who comes your
way,
no one is too small or undeserved;
to love is to forgive though sometimes you hurt the most;
to love is to pray for someone who has a pain,
be it a wounded finger, or an unspoken fear;
to love is to share good times and broken dreams;
to love is to enjoy with each other
both the sunshine and the rain,
music of others and your own;
to love is to share your time with people you love -
family or friends,
a meal, a chat, a call, a game, an occasion to celebrate
or just an ordinary day;
to love is to laugh or cry together
over a joke or a hurt that no one seems to understand.
And
again to love is to love now,
when someone is in danger and you to give a helping
hand not counting what it costs;
to love is to give of yourself for the life of others,
by instinct, even to sacrifice your own.
And love has no end.

My dearest son, Zi On, that is you. You have taught us what is
love. And God shines forth in your life because you love.

Today, we celebrate your birthday. We celebrate your life-
a great life -
with sweet remembrance of you, memories, countless and
precious; and with our hearts humbled and touched.

Yes, mama promises: I don’t want to cry today.
It is your birthday and we want to celebrate with joy and thankfulness to God for His special gift to us, a son and brother to cherish and hold; and when it is time God wants to use you, we surrender to His sovereign will.

And we know today, in the presence of God, the angels in heaven celebrate your birthday with you with joyful singing.

HAPPY BRITHDAY Zi On !

Love forever,
Mama together with papa and Zi Lu
14-01-2008

Sunday, January 13, 2008

Today is your birthday

Dearest Zi On,

Today is your birthday -- 14-01-2008.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ! SON, MY DEAR SON.
You are 26 today! We celebrate your life!

On, Happy Birthday! I love you, mama loves you, Pa loves you,
Zi Lu loves you.

The Lord Jesus loves you! Yes, God, our Heavenly Father, He who created you, He loves you.

I praise God because you are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are a unique individual, specially created for a special purpose. You are highly valued by God.

After papa and I were married in 1979, I began to pray that God would give us a son. Yes papa and I prayed to God for you.

Yes, I remember I asked God like Hannah did that God would give me a son, I specifically asked for a son. And I also told the Lord that my son would be given to Him for His use – that his life would be useful to Him.

As I look back now, yes, the Lord has indeed heard my prayers.
God gave you to us, and God used you.

‘What name shall we give our son?’ we asked when you were born.
When we looked into the Bible for inspiration and guidance
Psalm 50:2 stood out:

Out of Zion, perfect in beauty,
God shines forth.

We know Zion refers to God, His holy mountain, the mountain which symbolizes God, His righteousness and His total attributes of His holiness and perfection. It was our prayers and desires that this gift from God, this son of ours would develop the attributes of godliness and that God would shine forth in his life.

In order to retain the Chinese identity, we had broken the word Zion into 2 parts Zi On and to add another meaning to his name. ie.
Zi On is made up of 2 Chinese characters. Zi in Chinese means fulfilled, On is grace. So the second meaning of your name is by the grace of God, our wish (for a son) is fulfilled.

Son, for many years, I know that you had been searching for your purpose in life.

I had frequently shared with you of my purpose in life. I shared with you that from young I searched for a meaningful life. To me it is so important that I live a meaningful life. When I found Christ and finally committed my life to Him, I already found the answer to my quest – A meaningful life is to have Jesus.

“To know Christ and to make Him known” is my aspired life vision. I told you that there is no other vision better than this for me. For papa it is the same. Together, when we were married, we also entrusted our lives to God with this goal and claimed this great promise of God in Matthew 6:33 “But seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be yours as well.” (all the things we need for this life God will provide)

Son, you know that this is for us. But you said you wanted to know God not through our faith. You wanted to experience God yourself and find your life purpose yourself.

Remember we shared this together?

Some wandered in desert wastelands,
finding no way to a city where they could settle.
They were hungry and thirsty,
and their lives ebbed away.
Then they cried out to the Lord in their trouble,
and he delivered them from their distress.

He led them by a straight way
to a city where they could settle.
Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love
and his wonderful deeds for men,
for he satisfies the thirsty
and fills the hungry with good things.

Ps 107:4-9

And I thank the Lord for He has heard your cry and my cry.

You had finally come to Jesus and not through our faith, but your own. You surrendered all your burdens to Him as you recorded in your journal:
“I surrender to Jesus- my poverty replace with His rich treasures, all challenging situations with patience and encouragement through God’s love and patience, place my burdens on God’s shoulders, acknowledge His power in my life.”

To me, this is one of the greatest joys for any parents who know Jesus and want their children to know Him, too.

But this is only part of your story, though an important one.

Yours is also a story of love.
You teach us that love is a better way.


You teach us that love is a better way,
not success as men of the world want to see;
not achievements, though many strive with no end;
not riches if you have to toil all your life and miss it;
not praises from men, for God understands what is in a
man.

You teach us that love is a better way-
To love is to love now,
not till your task is over
nor later for an appointment that cannot be missed;
to love is to give now,
not when you have made more;
to love is share now when someone has a need,
not when you are free with no commitments to meet;
to love is to listen now,
no story or dream of another is too boring;
to love is to pass no judgment,
but a word of encouragement;
to love is to be kind and gentle to anyone who comes your
way,
no one is too small or undeserved;
to love is to forgive though sometimes you hurt the most;
to love is to pray for someone who has a pain,
be it a wounded finger, or an unspoken fear;
to love is to share good times and broken dreams;
to love is to enjoy with each other
both the sunshine and the rain,
music of others and your own;
to love is to share your time with people you love -
family or friends,
a meal, a chat, a call, a game, an occasion to celebrate
or just an ordinary day;
to love is to laugh or cry together
over a joke or a hurt that no one seems to understand.

And
again to love is to love now,
when someone is in danger and you to give a helping
hand not counting what it costs;
to love is to give of yourself for the life of others,
by instinct, even to sacrifice your own.
And love has no end.

My dearest son, Zi On, that is you. You have taught us what is
love. And God shines forth in your life because you love.

Today, we celebrate your birthday. We celebrate your life-
a great life -
with sweet remembrance of you, memories, countless and
precious; and with our hearts humbled and touched.

Yes, mama promises: I don’t want to cry today.
It is your birthday and we want to celebrate with joy and thankfulness to God for His special gift to us, a son and brother to cherish and hold; and when it is time God wants to use you, we surrender to His sovereign will.

And we know today, in the presence of God, the angels in heaven celebrate your birthday with you with joyful singing.

HAPPY BRITHDAY Zi On !

Love forever,
Mama together with papa and Zi Lu
14-01-2008

Friday, January 11, 2008

“One who pleased God”

Zi On’s life has been a life that is full of purpose. Even at such a young age of 26, he has learned a life of sacrificial love. He has role modeled to be like Christ and sacrificed his life to save an unknown Korean girl. Zi On lived in Brisbane for just 6 months, yet he has impacted so many people’s lives with such a noble act. It is just like what the Bible has said, that when one grain drops to the ground, it will grow in numbers. Zi On’s life has demonstrated that. Even though his body was not found, His recent profound thoughts of God’s words have shown his faith in Christ and understanding of his purpose in life. It’s true of what is written in the book of Hebrews 11:5-6, “By faith Enoch has been this life, so that he did not experience death. He could not be found, because God has taken him away. Before he was taken, he was commended as one who pleased God, because anyone who comes to Him, must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him.” Zi On’s body may not be found, but we by faith believe that Zi On has pleased God by demonstrating such sacrificial love.

Enoch’s life was 365 when he was taken. Average 900 years old. Enoch (Hebrew: חֲנוֹךְ; Tiberian: Ḥănōḵ, Standard: Ḥanokh, Arabic:إدريس) is a name occurring twice in the generations of Adam. In one, he is described as having had a city named after him, but it is the other occurrence for which the name is famous. Despite the fame, the second mention of the name merely says that Enoch walked with God, and was not, for God took him, that he lived 365 years, and that he was the great-grandfather of Noah. (Genesis 5:22-29)

Zi On was taken at 26. Average age of a person is 80 years.


A Tribute to Zi On from J’Remy Chua
10-1-2008 Melbourne

Wednesday, January 9, 2008

A Tribute to Zi On

I’ve known Zi for five months in Brisbane. I first met him at the life group which was on Friday 20 or 27 July 2007. We had a party called ‘Christmas in July’ because it was winter. At the first point I met him, I didn’t talk much to him. I just noticed that he was a new visitor who joined the party.

Next Friday we had a regular activity for the life group. I remembered that he came along with the bright smile whereas other new visitors from last week didn’t show up. I didn’t know that he was a Christian at that time, so I was impressed so much how enthusiastic he needed to know God. During the dinner we had a chat and he said that he was impressed with a warm and lively relationship we had in this group, so he decided to become a member of this group.

He consistently joined the life group. One thing I clearly remembered about him was during the bible discussion he always took notes for some interesting points so that he can ponder about it later. And he shared that he knew very little about God, so he would like to learn as much as he can. He amazed me a lot.

Indeed, I’ve not become close to him during the first two or three months. However, I met him sometimes in the university and had a chat. He always smiled and made me comfortable to talk to him. He was very good at making new friends. I used to share with him about how terrible my study was going, he then encouraged me to keep going on. He always encouraged me.

I also noticed that he was a very hard working student. Though he was worried about his study, he tried to smile and bring happiness to others all the time. He shared that he really wanted to get a part time job during the summer break though he had a few weeks left before departure.

I was glad to know that he would go to Moreton Island with us. We had a great time together there. I remembered that he had a bit burning sensation at his nose, so I made a joke to him that he forgot to apply sunscreen lotion on it. After lunch, we went swimming at a fresh water lake called ‘Blue Lagoon’. It was a very nice place to swim. I noticed that he was very happy to swim and have a great time.

I’m so grateful to know him and especially after I know him more from uncle and auntie. I thank God for his life that has left a great impact to my life. I’ve learnt to be humble from him. He easily makes people comfortable.

I’m not able to explain how sorrowful I am to lose him but I’m convinced that wherever he is now, God is taking care of him and that brings me comfort.

Uncle and auntie when you are reading this letter, please know that I’m really grateful to your life. You have set an example of what Christians should deal with the tough situation and you did it very well. I thank God for your life and pray that God’s comfort and peace will fill in your life and mind. Pray that your heavy burden will be lifted up and replaced by God’s love and joy.

Thank you so much for everything you have shared and done for me and Zi’s friends. All of us are so grateful to you.

May God bless you. I will pray for you and Zi Lu as well.

God’s grace be with you,

Chim (Mr.Katachai Laosrimongkol)
21 December 2007
Brisbane

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

To our dearest Son, Zi On – Tribute from Mama

To our dearest Son, Zi On

Today is 5 January 2008. Yes it has been a month already. Zi On has left us a month ago on this day. Yet as it is still morning about 8a.m now, he must have just locked his apartment, took his bag and started the journey to Moreton Island. His heart must be happy as he was going to see this beautiful island with some of his good friends. It was a happy day for him. His best friend Ramesh recalled, “It was a happy day for him, and for all of us too.”

This happy day was also the day he made a brave decision, by instinct, to truly follow the example of Jesus, to lay down his life for others.

Son, my dear son, you did not even say good-bye to us. You did not say good-bye to your friends. You gave yourself and surrendered to Jesus your life, your body and everything. And the Lord was there to receive you and happily you put your hands in His hands and said, “Here I come, Lord Jesus, I am not fearful.” And just as you wrote in your diary on 14-8-2007, “Jesus as I am with you, be with me now.” We know, the Lord was there to lovingly receive you and said to you, “My dear child, I love you, welcome to your new home. You and I are going to take a new journey where there are no more tears, no more fears, no more pain, no more struggles, no more poverty, no more loneliness, no more rejection, no more sorrows. From this moment, yes now, I am with you always. You will only find true happiness, real joy, lasting peace and the everlasting presence of God and His love.” You always loved angels, now you will see the beautiful angels singing and welcoming you to your heavenly Father’s home. And the Lord said to you, “My child you will be glorified with me as I promised to all my children who believe in Me.”

Your dear papa said, “You ended your earthly life with a high note.” Yes, son, you did a gallant act, yes, a noble one, you are so brave! So brave, son, and papa, mama and Zi Lu, your little brother, are so proud of you.

You said, “I believe I am born for greater things than this.”
Yes, you left us with a triumphant act and fulfilled God’s purpose for your life. Son, we are so proud of you! We also know, the Lord Jesus said to you as He received you, “Well done, my good and faithful servant!”

You said and recorded in your journal, you asked God when you were learning about Fasting and Powers to claim:

“Make me a man of substance,
Make me a man of courage,
Make me a man of dependability,
Make me a man of persistence,
Make me a man of drive,
Make me a man of compassion and empathy,
Make me a man of true friendship”.

Yes son, you have fulfilled all these aspirations, such high and noble aspirations, and we are so very proud of you.

We humbly surrender you and return this special gift, our loving son and brother, to Jesus our Lord. We give all praises to God and all glory to Him, our Heavenly Father. Praise the Lord!

I love you, son, I love you my dearest Zi On.

From
Your mom, love you forever,
Mama
5-1-2008
Gosh where do I begin. When I heard the news a week before Christmas. Both Kaelin and I were in utter shock and disbelief. Yet, I knew then that this is exactly the kind of heroic action that Zi On would do for another human being...that thought, nevertheless, did not make it any easier for us to digest the news.
I have known Zi On since he was a little baby and watched him grown into a fine young man. He was always the careful one, the steady one. Zi Lu was absolutely right their polar personalities. But they complement each other so well. In my mind they are the perfect duo in the Kerk's family!
Ta Ge, Ta Sau, Zi Lu, I know this is difficult time for you. Nothing I say will make the pain go away any quicker, nor is that my intention. Grieving is a messy process. Time is the only cure. Although I am not a Christian, I believe in higher power. God will take good care of Zi On. What He needs you to do is take good care of yourselves.

Uncle Leon & aunty Kaelin in Portland Oregon USA

Sunday, January 6, 2008

Allan's Words..

Tall and lanky,
Never cranky,
Always with a smile,
Up to a mile,
Outrageously colored hair,
Oh, so full of flair,
Laughing loudly,
Walking proudly,
As son, brother, cousin, friend,
Always there with a helping hand,
With a swim and a dive,
Touching hearts and saving lives,
Model of heroism,
Paradigm of altruism,
Heart of gold,
Ever so bold,
Kind and giving,
Loving and caring,
So much we can learn,
From the life of Kerk Zi On
I will always remember the kittens and the cats (White Tiger for one).
I will always remember you playing with the drums and toy guns.
I will always remember us playing football and video games.
I will always remember your laughter, smiles and optimism.
I will always remember you, my cousin.

A Loving Tribute to Zi On

Just like that, he was taken from our midst without even a goodbye, leaving a void in each of our hearts. Even as we mourn our loss, we also celebrate his life for we know God has given him as a precious gift to us. In our own way, we will always cherish and treasure the time spent with him. He has been a truly wonderful son, brother, grandson, nephew, cousin and friend to all of us who have been given the privilege to know and love him.

In the Bible it is stated in John 15:13, “Greater love has no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends”. In laying down his own life for 2 persons, one of whom was a total stranger, Zi On has taken this love to a higher and deeper level. As Christians, we are often referred to in the Bible as “soldiers of Christ”. Zi On has proven that he is indeed a TRUE and WORTHY soldier of Christ. Surely, the Lord Jesus Christ Himself will present him a beautiful crown and lovingly place it on his head.

We commend our sister Cho Tan and brother-in-law Kerk Choon Keng for having brought up such an exceptionally fine young man. He is truly a son to be proud of. And to Zi Lu, you must be proud to have such an amazing brother.

We take comfort in knowing Zi On is with his Creator God and in the loving arms of his Heavenly Father and we look forward to the day when we can all be reunited in heaven.

Zi On, you will always remain in our hearts and we will always love you.

With love,

Aunty Cho Bee & family

20th Dec. 2007

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

From Emily Flahive.

Zion and I had a Korean class together at ANU. We were both beginners, filling in units to complete our degrees. Zion was always happy and very friendly. We had lots of group activities in our class, and one day I asked Zion where he came from (in bad Korean!) We then got talking about Malaysia, and he was interested in the fact that my parents were in Malaysia working at Bethany Home. At the end of the university semester I went to visit my parents in Malaysia. Whilst there, some friends of theirs (the Kerks) invited us to visit their palm plantation. After the tour Mr Kerk offered us some cold drinks and we got talking about his family and he mentioned he had a son at ANU. I was very surprised to find that his son was Zion who I had been studying with!! I didn’t see Zion again until the end of the year after we had both graduated. I met up briefly with Zion and his parents as my family wished to congratulate Zion on his graduation and I dropped off a bottle of champagne at the hotel where they were staying.
My encounters with Zion were brief, but memorable. It was a shock to hear the tragic news about him, and my heart goes out to his family and friends.
- Emily Flahive.

For Zi On- who lived as a blessing to so many (Delphine Tan)

I remember his smile. I remember his laugh. It had been two years since I had heard from Zi On. The next thing I know, he has saved a life and in the process, lost his own. When I first heard the news, the search for him was still continuing. These searches have ended today.
This verse has since entered my mind:

GREATER LOVE HATH NO MAN THAN THIS, THAT A MAN LAY DOWN HIS LIFE FOR HIS FRIENDS-Jn 15:13.
I find great comfort in the fact that he has left us because of his innately good nature. He had a choice and he chose to show love and compassion. I hope that Uncle and Aunty Kerk will find comfort in the fact that this is a mere temporary seperation and they are bound to be reunited in due course.

I hope that none of us will regret anything that may have transpired throughout the time Zi On was here with us on earth, especially his loving family. Things that may seem to have been "mistakes" may be blessings. Zi On would not have become the man we all know if those "mistakes" had not occurred. We have to trust that our God is a mighty one and everything has come to pass according to His plans and not due to our fallibililty. God’s ways are higher than our ways and His plans are perfect for us.

I truly hope that the girl, whose life was saved will turn to Jesus and come to know him.
I know he will find peace and joy in heaven. May his act of love bring many to the Lord.

John 3:16
For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in Him, should not perish, but have eternal life.
My prayer is that many will hear of his story will realise that like that girl, they will drown unless they are willing to rely on Jesus who, out of love, died for them.
Below is a devotional from the RBC that I hope may encourage you:

December 12, 2007

Grief Is Messy
READ: 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18
I do not want you to be ignorant, brethren, concerning those who have fallen asleep, lest you sorrow as others who have no hope. —1 Thessalonians 4:13
The film We Are Marshall tells of the November 14, 1970, plane crash that took the lives of most of the Marshall University football team, the coaching staff, and many community leaders of Huntington, West Virginia. Seventy-five lives were lost in the crash, which devastated the university and the community. Through the composite characters of Paul Griffen and Annie Cantrell, the film dramatizes the aftermath of the crash. Their stories intertwine because Griffen’s son, Chris, was Annie’s fiancé. When Chris died, their lives were plunged into a year of pain that seemed unbearable. Why? Because, as Paul told Annie, "Grief is messy."
He was right, grief is messy. All of us grieve at one time or another—including those of us who are Christ-followers. For the believer, however, there is something beyond the tears, pain, and loss. There is hope.
Writing to a church family who had seen loved ones taken in death, Paul acknowledged the reality of grief. But he challenged them not to "sorrow as others who have no hope" (1 Thess. 4:13). Loss and death are part of life, but believers can face them, knowing that Christians never say goodbye for the last time. We can comfort one another (v.18) with the hope of the resurrection and a future reunion.
—Bill Crowder

The Lord has promised to prepare
A place in heaven above—
A home where we will always be
With Him and those we love. —Sper
Because Christ lives, death is not tragedy but triumph.